Silly Billy!

Is it me or does someone  else actually make this face ” -_-” , ( yes, exactly like that ) when people ask you statements with a question mark at the end ??

Statements end with a full stop. Have i gone nuts?

No I haven’t . These other people have.

The people who ask you such obvious questions , that you don’t know, whether you are actually  supposed to answer it OR just ignore it OR do “Hain???” (O.o ? )

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UMM…Is that a trick question ???  :O

So as i sit down and think of these SILLY BILLY QUESTIONS , I  came up with answers , not every one will be  HAPPY to hear :P.

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But as far as i am concerned, it would at least give me Satisfaction 🙂

  • So you go to this restaurant with your family, all decked up , looking for a place to sit and there comes the waiter . ” Sir/Mam, DO YOU NEED A TABLE?”
    Well , no , obviously, I don’t . The flooring of the place is very intricately designed. Can we have a carpet for 4 please . Please . 🙂 🙂 🙂 :):)
  • You are somewhere. Could be anywhere. Along comes another human and mistakenly steps on your toe. *Ouch*. “I AM SORRY. DID THAT HURT?”
    Oh, no, it didn’t. If cotton balls fell on my feet, they would hurt. Your pencil heels/ sturdy shoes..NO , of course they didn’t  ^_^. It feels so soft actually.
  • You come back to home sweet home. The person who opens the door is smiling all the way “OH.HAVE YOU COME ?”.
    Have I ? I don’t think so , must be my spirit at work again ! i am still on my way home. Never listens to me. Running around always! -_-
  • And now that you are home , you take out food, sit down and just start devouring on the delicacies ” OH! ARE YOU EATING ? ”
    Puff.. NO! I don’t eat. I am practising magic .Its a trick . I can make food disappear. This is ain’t ‘eating’ . yeah!
  • You have a nice bath . All freshened up , you come out draped in your robe. “OH,HAVE YOU HAD A BATH?”
    Nooooo… Why would you think so ? Its the Hydrogen and Oxygen molecules reacting. 1:2 something . Me? I am just the catalyst  😉
  • Shopping in the mall , picking out clothes and there is always that one long lost friend who comes across “OMG. How long its been. SO WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?”
    Hi!..yeah its been some time. Well, nothing much, I come here to listen to the music .Not only does the FM has great signals here, the playlist of the store is awesome too. Although , I always notice , people shopping here , like always. Who does THAT in a shopping mall!!!! Right?? O.o
  • And this one is my all time favourite !!!!
    7db38e7f66f4e32d3670f9d17b685499Go on , share your Q and A’s . 😛

 

 

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To Deal with THE STUPID

Welcome back Dumasaphobics 😉 . 

If you don’t know/remember dumasaphobia, do check out this link first  – The FEAR of THE STUPID

As promised , here i am ,with tips to effectively deal with the stupid

And like every other thing there is a list  of the do’s and the don’ts .

Seeing and feeling ,  the intensity of the problem , I will not refrain you from taking actions in your defence. Therefore there is a very small list of the don’ts

  • Don’t kill them. 

That’s it.

If  you are any bit like me , then I understand that the very first instinct is to pick up the object nearest to you (from a flower vase or a knife to even a handbag ) and take away their right to life , which they have been clearly misusing. 

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However all peace you attain would go in vain, since you will now have to go to jail.

So well ,it would be stupid (oops!) of you to take this step!.

While we are on the topic of killing things, I have read at a lot of places and been advised a lot to beat these people at their own game with their own rules .  This could mean killing the rude stupids with kindness and  killing the dumb acting stupids with higher levels of dumbness.

Although this does sound really fun and interesting and also satisfying at some levels , it can really backfire in case of ultra stupids on the other side! With quite an experience of dealing with them I  can say that after a while , they start to enjoy it and you are left with feeling of being used again and again.

Well then with the most easiest and satisfying option done away with , what are the possible DO’s that MUST be followed. 

  1. ACCEPT –
    The first step to solve any problem in life is acceptance. Accept that these people are stupid. That you can not do anything ,any damn thing about it . That God has been unfair to them  or to you , what ever is easier to accept!  Understand the situation in hand .
  2. SMILE .-
    Like literally, keep those lips curved right up , always. Onto their face.
    🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 :).
    Inside , you maybe tearing up like THE HULK , but outside you remain a sweetie pie, the harbinger of happiness.       🙂    🙂 .
    bitch
    People will call you fake , but remember it is for the society’s good . When their actions fail to have a reaction , gradually the actions will also fail .
  3. I.G.N.O.R.E
    The most golden words ever said on this planet are definitely “Ignorance is a bliss ” . Yes it is difficult but not impossible . Accept that the person is stupid , but refuse to acknowledge them.  Their could be a zillion other things to think about at that time like the colour of your nail paint ,  the weather conditions and how the Met Dept always gets its prediction wrong. You can talk to unicorns if you want.
    But just don’t pay attention to the stupid acts going around you .
    you don’t want to go crazy .
    Your life is precious after all.
  4.  IF YOU MUST , TALK FACTS –
    In case you do have to discuss and talk and adjust with the other side , then refrain yourself from discussing opinions .
    Because to them , not only do your opinions don’t matter but facts , figures and reality are also equally useless
    . -_- .
    Follow the principle to only talk facts and only listen to facts . To ensure no arguments further, keep Google available.jellyfish.jpg
  5. INTRODUCE TWO OF A KIND
    It is very rare that you find only one of their kind in any place. Go ahead .
    Be the matchmaker .
    Let the like repel like.
    Let there be decreased net stupidity.
  6. PLAY ALONG
    Now this is real fun. “Mirror , Mirror on the wall Who doesn’t want to be the mightiest of all ? ” No one.
    Well , then what better way to de throne the kings and queens and princes and princesses of Stupidity than being more stupid than them ?
    Come on , Play along a bit.
    Play stupid once and then back to normal and back to stupid again .
    Drive the stupids to a level of confusion ,they can’t attack from  😛

 

Well , this is all the gyaan i have to share.
Please feel free to give your opinions and advice for the sake of the DUMASAPHOBIC Society  😀 😀 !!

 

 

 

 

What The !!!!!

So , who the hell does Shahrukh Khan think he is? or for that matter even Salman khan? Does Hrithik actually come as close to thinking  he looks like a Greek god???  Can you digest the fact that ladies go gaga over even Akshay Kumar and Arjun Rampal and Shahid Kapoor and Arjun Kapoor and Ranbir Kapoor? And what about Ranveer Kap…no…Singh !!!!!!

Like why on the face of earth ! ?? And please , for the love of god! Don’t even get started on those firangs! Brad pitt , Tom cruise ..and yeah who is that latest one? Zayn Malik! 

BEFORE YOU SWITCH TABS OR SEND ME HATE MESSAGES, CONTINUE READING. Yeah , again for the love of God!

I thought all of this piece of crap ( yes, i accept it is crap 🙂 ) yesterday while going to my workplace . Even though  i hate as much as the thought of it , i have to take these  one of a kind , truly Indian ( 😀 ) shared autorickhshaws to office .

But mind it, you don’t sit in these . You fit in them .

So once i fit in one of them ,all i could do was stare outside on the road and absorb the breathtaking view of all kinds of road transport, twisting and turning and honking .

And then IT happened. Like it happens every time. Every day . With every one.

A not so young and still not so old  man on the road , on his ravishingly old bike , winked at me . And just to make sure , that i  do see him , he did it again . I had to continue seeing his stupid face and stupid eyes as i couldn’t turn my head around ( i told you, we are fitted and fixed in just one position).

Not that i was surprised by that man .

Nothing new. :/

Today its a wink . Tomorrow its a see-i -eat- pan -and -have -dirty- and-crooked- teeth smile . On other days , someone will try to feel you up . There are days when you will hear the eeriest of comments and yet on  others it will be some song ,that you wont be found even dead listening to.

So yes it was nothing new. i followed the mantra “ignorance is a bliss”, rolled my eyes and closed them .  -_-

Once i closed them , i steered right into the minds of such men and tried to think , what goes on in their mind ???

yeah , that’s when i came out with that crap i wrote before. This is exactly what must be going on their minds!!!!right?

these perverts actually deserve to be the stars.

look at their confidence people!.

All he needs is a wink 😉 , like this to swoon me away on his two wheeler to land of fantasies!!! . They are the Christian Greys of their worlds. My inner goddess should awaken and fast. His songs and comments should fill me with the desires of lust ! Ahh, he is right ! Who the hell these if-looks-could-kill-good-looking-celebs think they are .

Its these roadside romeos we should drool for !

(Trust me , the disgust you felt while just reading this above statement, is nothing when compared to the nauseating disgust i felt while typing it . )

And then , my office came. I OPENED MY EYES. THESE PEOPLE ARE SICK. AND THEY NEED HELP. 

Your help. My help. Our help. Any kind of help. All kind of helps.

You could be the philanthropist reformer of the society and conduct workshops and awareness camps.

OR

The next you come across such a sick person , You could just thrash the living hell out of his system. ( I prefer this ,seriously)

The choice is YOURS. But the need is OURS.

 

Here is a you tube link ,  to one of the just rightly made video on  the issue.

Still Staring ?

Do check it out

BeSafe 🙂

P.S : SRK , I still love you ❤

P.P.S Try and get the Sarcasm right or else you will ruin this  😀

 

 

 

 

The Minion dollar advice ;)

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Well the picture says it all.

Why?

Because when you in actual and real terms do come-of-age OR you could say attain  maturity to HAVE  a man in your life , you will realise that you indeed don’t NEED a man so badly!

Oh yes,  You will WANT a man for sure, but not NEED him .

Your life can go about as normally without a man as with him. Trust me.

Yeah i know , why would you trust me? Its not as if i am some Marilyn Monroe of somewhere !

Well in  that case , trust her at the least.

 “No woman needs a man who doesn’t need her”.

( slightly abridged 😛 )

At this age all you will get is boys who are as immature and kiddish as you.

And same for the boys.

You wont find your one true love  .Your snow whites and cinderellas .

All you will only get is a girl who will want to eat chocolate and also throw tantrums all around .

And it is not your fault too!.  These insane  hormones , i tell you !!  -_-

So well , for now

Make friends. Friends for a lifetime .

Relationships are no joke. Childhood is meant for  jokes. Once its gone , You will regret it all long.

Take this as an advice from a girl who JUST officially entered her adult zone!

Okay fine, i passed school three years ago and am in the last year of graduation … But the transition dawned on me only when i joined office for my internship 😉 . Hence , the JUST 😛

Seriously ,stop already asking for tensions in your life.

Make yourself strong and independent.

Help people.

Study. Hard. 😛read

Dance.

Draw.

Sing.

Click.

Clap.

Tap.

 

But don’t already need a man , little miss ❤ ❤

Fly . Just Fly :)

Among all the categories of people around you that should be scared of

(some of them can make you dumasaphobics 😉 see https://peppynotes.wordpress.com/2015/10/22/the-fear-of-the-stupid/ )

there are  this one ” species”  of people which you need to identify at the earliest . And then stay away from them forever. And also understand ( if it wasn’t obvious) that i am currently pissed at one of their kind   😛 f4e37dd5b4a434a35efbc2004aaeeabc

No I am not talking about kleptomaniacs …they need your help silly.

Rather I am talking about the humans who try to bring you down. Who hold you back .  They will always in their unique ways be able to discourage you from going ahead on your life. You will know its wrong and yet succumb to their extremely charming convincing powers ( wish they would use that for better use though !)

Like always , these people could be any one. But a major Group will be your all kinds of X’s

Your ex boy friends, girl friends or any ex friend ( with whom you have broken your ties ).  They will make sure to constantly remind you every single moment of how  you have wronged them. In reality you may or may not have, but then who is speaking the truth ? You? The  self righteous -having- better – work- to- do soul ? Or The- forever-teary -eyed -stage five clinger?

Their constant cribbing and sheer failure to understand that the world doesn’t revolve around them , will prevent you from moving on in life.

There  will be all kinds of emo drama and theatrical dialogue delivery . To some of which you wont have a reply. Or even a reaction . Or an emoji too .

How to identify if your ex is the one?

Well its simple.

This particular person will tell the whole world about you, the made up stories of your betrayal. You wont be the first person he/she discusses the issues with.They will always complain about you.

And when you do have some real discussions face to face , all the  person will do is lie and of course argue 🙂 . He/she will remind you of promises and all , rather than solving the issue. Basically at the end you will agree its your fault.

The other sub species of these people could be a Y too –  your friend, your partner  , your teacher or even a relative.

These are the  people  ( if you insist on calling them that still ! ) who tend to pass off everything as a joke. Everything related to you that is. Not themselves.

You top your class. Then you are a nerd who always studies. Now , seriously c’mon man who studies so much?

They top the class. Well then the world has always been a mirror to their hard work , smart work and good luck , you see.

You want to start something new. They are the ones with the most discouraging outrageous  negative opinions which they will  later pass it off as a joke.

You broke up. Its another joke

They break up. They will make you  cry too.

The second category of people are more common and more dangerous.

Although  because they don’t have the simple ability to judge when and what to speak , it is pointless to even listen to them.

As unfortunate it is , that in spite of being born in the land of The Mahatma (Gandhi), i believe resorting to violence is the only way with such types  that will give me eternal satisfaction . Nevertheless here are a few tips that MAY help to calm you down in such not-so-people- friendly situations

  1. Stop listening. Their cries and their jokes. Just don’t listen . And its easy. You have been doing that with your teachers and parents since time immemorial . 😉

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   2 .Stop talking. The moment the other person comes back to crib , just stop talking.  When they stop , talk again on an entirely different issue( i.e only if you want to ) . Repeat the cycle. Its rude at first , but then all the negativity that disappears from your life will make it worth it.

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sure it has 🙂

3.Stop sharing your success. Just tell them about how you think you failed. The super powers of making everything funny will at the least ease your pain . 🙂

  1. Move on. Yes . Just leave that person there and then. Not for new friends and partners. For your own god damn sake.eca5087f5540006982122d1e0a6d9bd0

Grow apart from people who do not grow

All the best 😊

P.S Well , writing does calm me down 😉 .

The Apple of our eyes :)

July 9 ,2014 changed my life for the better . Not only mine. Every life linked with me in real terms (blood relations ,that is ) . My sister gave birth to a baby girl .A beautiful baby girl .  Her minuscule fingers tightly bound in a fist , her hands and legs all curled up and eyes not yet open – She was by all means the perfect bundle of joy  .                                                   .

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Even before her birth she was the most awaited child for all of us . After all , one of us  brothers and sisters had finally grown up to finally start her own brood 😛

Oh ! these little teeny tiny creatures ,  only if they knew what happiness and splendor they bring with them . It’s like a festival .

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A never ending festival for the parents at least 😛

A new member is added to the family.

The feeling of belonging knows no bounds . From being a cell a few months back , she is now a part of our family. Our decisions and choices will now be affected by her.

We have to protect her, from all the miseries of the world, from anything that scares her. She is ours. She is mine 🙂

For me she is an angelic saint , who relieves me of all my tensions by her mere presence around . No worries, no anxiety , no work load has been and will be able to beat her innocence.

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Working in the kitchen 😉

Her charismatic smiles

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Her vibrant eyes

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Her soft and delicate fingers !

Her squeaky voices ! ( i really wish i could have an audio clip here 😀 )

Her adorable pair of teeth. Two on the top . Two below .

Every time i see  you girl , i can’t control my happiness and as a matter of fact , i don’t even want to.

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These babies remind you of all the things we as grownups have forgotten in the hum drum of our busy lives. We run after targets, exams, deadlines and of course money.

They ?

They don’t even know how to stand up.  😛 They slowly learn it. 😀

And we as adults feel so proud when see them walk , all in a zig zag manner though 😛 .

The process of teaching them to speak , to count , to eat , to pray ,to walk , to run ,to shit ,  to do everything so simple is tiring and yet satisfying.  When she picks up an action i do often , oh i feel like cuddling her up tightly and swing her around . That’s my way of expressing joy (I don’t do it though 😛 )  . The sense of responsibility arises in me. To teach her just the right things .

The babies also teach you things back. The very first and most important  – Being patient. 😀 haha .

They also  teach you that nothing is impossible for us to do .  We just need to have constant determination . The curiosity within us should never die .

Witnessing their sheer joy on something as trivial as a moving colourful ball , unwinds and relaxes us from even the most complex situations of life .

IMG-20150905-WA0016 IMG-20150905-WA0011 Our Krishna and our Radha 😉

Dear Advika ( Iha ) , i want you to read this when you are grown up . There will be times when you will feel like questioning your self . When you may feel broken. When you feel low.

I want you to read this to remind you , that how as just a 1 year old you made all people around you so happy and glad. You can do it again.  You will do it always.

Just be yourself.  Be innocent. Be curious. Learn. Respect. Teach. Smile. Play. Love. Laugh. LIVE 🙂

We are so proud of you now. Make sure to make us all the more proud.

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Enjoy baby :*

Love XOXO ,

Masi 🙂